


Untitled adventures of Gertie the Goose

by fortytworedvines



Category: Cabin Pressure, Untitled Goose Game (Video Game)
Genre: Gen, Martin's goose is the goose from untitled goose game, abetted by goose, he keeps it, talisker stealing, this is very silly
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-13
Updated: 2019-11-13
Packaged: 2021-01-30 00:27:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 699
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21419173
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fortytworedvines/pseuds/fortytworedvines
Summary: Martin keeps his goose. Birling day antics occur.
Relationships: Martin Crieff & Arthur Shappey, Martin Crieff & Douglas Richardson
Comments: 14
Kudos: 36
Collections: Untitled Goose Exchange 2: 2 Goose 2 Furious





	Untitled adventures of Gertie the Goose

**Author's Note:**

  * For [crookedspoon](https://archiveofourown.org/users/crookedspoon/gifts).

> Written for the untitled goose exchange 2

Martin clamped an arm firmly around the recalcitrant goose, who honked unappreciatively, and struggled precariously down Gerti’s steps to the tarmac. Arthur followed him, arms full with Finn, the stuffed sheep. Douglas brought up the rear, unencumbered by animals – dead or alive.

“Thanks for giving me a lift, Skip,” Arthur said cheerily.

“That’s alright, you can help me with the goose when we get to mine. Argh!”

“She looks quite angry, Skip.”

“Ffflb,” Martin said fluently, around the feathers in his mouth. He spat them out. “I think I’d rather be back in the rain with the sheep.”

“What are you going to do with her?”

“Put her in the back garden until my dad’s ring reappears.”

Arthur pulled a face as he thought about the process involved. “Won’t your housemates mind?”

“They’re agricultural students,” Douglas reminded him, “They’ll be thrilled.”

Arthur glanced up at the control tower. “Oh look! There’s Karl and Dirk!” He waved awkwardly over the sheep. “Why are they staring at us?”

“I can’t imagine,” Douglas drawled.

* * *

It was early. Martin got out of bed, stretched and moved idly to the window, taking in the view of the garden, which the morning sun was brightening. He stopped and stared. There was somebody – somebody in Gertie’s pen. Somebody familiar. He pulled on his dressing gown and shoes and hurried downstairs.

“Get off, get off!” Douglas was pushing Gertie the Goose away when Martin arrived at the pen.

“Douglas? What are you doing?”

“Oh, hello Martin.” Douglas stood and brushed the mud off his jacket, trying to look casual. Gertie honked at him.

“What – what are you doing in my back garden? What are you doing with Gertie? Is that a bottle of Talisker?!”

“It’s just – ow!”

“_HONK_”

“Can you just help me – thanks.” Douglas grabbed Martin’s arm and clambered gratefully out of the enclosure. “It occurred to me that this goose, with unerring instinct, located and ate your dad’s ring. With such impeccable credentials, I thought I might enlist it to help me with the next Talisker Heist.”

Comprehension dawned. “It’s Birling Day next week.”

“Yes. And if I can just persuade Carolyn to stop here first, your goose could steal the talisker before we even get to the plane."

“What’s in it for me?”

“Twenty percent of the proceeds.”

“Fifty. It’s my goose.”

“Thirty five?”

“Done.” They shook hands. “How’s the training going?”

“Not well.” They watched Gerti waddle to the far side of the pen.

“What’s that in her mouth?”

“My keys!”

“The great Douglas Richardson, outwitted by a goose.”

* * *

“If this is your idea of a cunning plan,” Carolyn huffed as they chased Gertie around Martin’s back garden, “I’m afraid you’re losing your touch.”

“It was a good plan!” Douglas insisted as he made a grab for the goose and missed.

“It absolutely was not. Arthur! She’s coming your way!”

Arthur made an enthusiastic dive and landed full length in a puddle of mud.

“Blame Martin,” Douglas said as he helped Arthur up with a grimace, “He’s the one who kept it.”

“I don’t care whose fault it is,” Carolyn panted, “What I care about is getting my keys back before we’re late for Mr Birling.”

“I have an idea,” Martin said. He pulled the garden hose out and lay it temptingly on the ground.

With an excited honk, Gertie dropped the keys and rushed over to the tap.

“Well done, Martin!” Carolyn said, just as Gertie turned the tap and sprayed water over all of them – except Martin.

“You just have to give her something more annoying to do,” Martin said smugly, from his position out of the range of the water, “It’s quite easy really.”

“Right. Right.” Carolyn spluttered. “Everybody into the car. Try not to squelch too much. Arthur, don’t sit down. We’ve just got time to get cleaned up and back to the airfield before Birling arrives.” 

Carolyn led the way out of the garden.

“Operation status?” Douglas murmured to Martin.

“Achieved, but the students want a cut.”

“Of course they do. By the way, me getting soaking wet was not part of the plan.” Martin grinned and Douglas glowered at him. “That goose is rubbing off on you.”


End file.
